There really are advantages to having a large family.
I have a lot of friends that say they could not imagine having five children. They say, “I have one child that consumes all my emotion, time and energy, I could not imagine having another one, let alone two or three more!” Or, “I could not imagine loving another child as much as I love this one.”
It is very possible to love all your children with the same amount of love for each of them because we have a God!
We have a God that gives us unending grace and love that we can transfer to our children. The more children in the family, the more exchanges of love you can give and receive in return.
I’ve heard from other moms as well who have three, four, or five plus children, and the majority of those moms agree in that…
“I really does get easier the more children you have!”
I’m not perfect, like I said before, I have my struggles in getting easily frustrated with my children. I sometimes set my standards and expectations too high on my children. However, parenting really is easier now than when I had my first child or two.
Here are 7 Advantages to Having a Large Family:
1. BREAKTHROUGHS IN YOUR LIFE
Our children are the iron in our lives.
“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another,” Proverbs 27:17
Children reveal our weaknesses. They show you what you need to overcome. I’ve had many breakthroughs since my oldest has been born. Things I’ve struggled with six years ago, I don’t deal with anymore because my children have been used to bring them to the light.
The more breakthroughs we experience will lead us to more freedom!
2. GAINING CONFIDENCE
You are overwhelmed when you have your first child. You’ve never been a mother. No one taught you. No one explained it to you. You didn’t have any experience in this expertise. You were nervous, fearful, concerned about every little thing with your first child. You’ve never done this before.
However, when your 3rd or 4th comes around, you’ve gained so much more confidence in yourself as a mother. You’re more relaxed rocking your baby to sleep. You’re not all worked up when your baby or toddler cries. You are more chill- not as uptight. You’ve done this before. Confidence is instilled in you from the experience you are getting.
3. STOP COMPARING
The more children you have, the more you realize neither you nor your children are perfect. You stop thinking you’ve got it all together. You stop looking down on that other mother that doesn’t handle mothering the same way you do.
This goes back to the confidence. When you’re confident in who you are as a mother, you stop comparing yourself to other moms. When your child screams and cries in public, your main concern is not what the people around you might think. But rather, your main concern is on your child and what his or her need is in that moment. You are able to think more clearly in how you should handle that situation because of your focused attention on your child.
4. LESS FEAR
I think most of us moms deal with a lot of fear, especially when we have our first. A toy that has fallen on the floor, we sanitize it then give it back to our child. We wonder if our child is still alive in their crib when they are taking a long nap, hoping they are still breathing. We don’t want them to fall and hurt themselves. We attend to every little cry we hear. I could keep listing the scenarios. I’m guilty of some of these things myself. However, most of us moms deal with fears like these less and less after another child is born. You are able to focus on the big picture rather than every little event with your child.
5. YOU’VE GOT HELPERS
The more children you have, the more help you have around the house. I don’t want to sound like I have little slaves running around the house. However, teaching children responsibility at a young age is very important and can help direct the course of their lives. As your children get older and start helping around the house more, this will lighten your load. Your children can help you with the every day tasks that need to be done.
Here is a chore sheet to help direct you in providing chores for your younger children. Fill out the form below to receive this FREE printout.
6. ENTERTAIN EACH OTHER
There are parts of the day that I need to focus and get stuff done around the house that only I can do. Most times my older children can play well together and keep each other occupied as I accomplish these tasks. They also have a big part in entertaining their younger siblings, being able to keep them content.
7. IT’S FUN!
The more children around, the more fun it is! I’ve been laughing more lately than I have in a long time. We all know those smart comments young children can make while being completely serious. Plus all the funny things that come out while being goofy with each other. With now four of those characters around, my days have been filled with many, many moments of laughter!
I’m also looking forward to when they get older and all the memories and fun times we will have together as a large family.
Parenting is draining, yes, its exhausting. However, I believe parenting can become less and less stressful each time a new child is born. You’ve been through it several times now. You have an idea of what to expect. Parenting is becoming easier!
Do you believe this to be true? Share your opinions below.
Here are a few of my favorite large family posts…
ClubWomen31, Lisa Jacobson- 8 Reasons Why I Love Having All These Kids
BrinaLynn- An Honest Look at What It’s Like Living In a Large Family
7 Amazing Advantages to Having a Really Large Family
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Totally agree. My mum had nine (now ages 31 right down to 6) and is the chillest person I know. I loved being part of a big family, so I’m married, 22 and planning five for myself, 76 days from my due date with baby three 🙂
We have so many friends that only have one, and its unbelievable how much they stress over their one. They all say one and done! Which is completely incomprehensible to me 😛
My third will make three at three and under, and with my two girls, 1.5, and 2.5, I swear, I stress so little. It looks like choas when I take them out, but really… it’s not unbearable, and people are mostly forgiving.
They both fill my life with so much joy, and even on the days they don’t, they at least take some of the whingeing out on each other 😛
Having a good attitude and being able to hit the ground running are absolutely invaluable in my house 🙂
Oh Katie, I feel ya! That’s so exciting to know you want a lot of children, and on top of it, having them all close together! Our children are super close because of how close they are in age. And I know it will continue that way as they continue to get older. Thanks so much for sharing your heart and testimony. It’s always encouraging to hear others with similar perspectives!
I can’t imagine this. I have two (four months and three years old) and I feel so pulled in all directions. Someone always needs something. Someone isn’t sleeping through the night. Getting them to nap at the same time is impossible. I never have any time to myself. And when they’re both crying at the same time, I feel like I’m losing my mind. Let’s not even talk about how neglected my poor husband is. My heart would love to have a third but I don’t think I can physically do it.
Oh, Nina! I feel ya. It was really hard for me when I had just two. The breakthrough for me started happening when I had our third. They were getting older and I started becoming more confident in this mothering thing (just like I had mentioned in the post.) It really is just a season, Nina. They will get older, they will get more mature, and they WILL become less dependent on you! I know it’s so hard to believe this while you are in the middle of it. For me, even though I say it’s easier, it still is not perfect for me. I still having crying toddlers, kids fighting, etc. But the positive of what I see in myself and in my children overrides all the negative! I will be praying for you Nina, in this season of life for you to experience more peace and grace when needed most!
Thank you so very much for sharing this. I have four children ages 6,5, 3.5, and almost 19 months. I am a stay at home mom and my husband is very busy at his job. People think I am crazy and some times I worry my kids do as well because we cannot do all the extra stuff because of our budget. I just hope and pray that they know they are loved.
Megan, almost every stranger we come across thinks we are crazy! And we do not do extra activities for our children as well. They will know they are loved just by your relationship with each of them. I’m so glad you were encouraged by this post. Thanks for stopping by!
Thanks for sharing, we have two bio children and hope to adopt a child from the fostercare system sometime in the next few years. I feel ready, but my husband is worried about the juggle of 3 kids. I plan to share this with him
Thanks, Jessi, for stopping by. I hope this post is an encouragement to your husband as well.
I completely agree. I have 4. They are now 8,7,2, and 1. I enjoy all of my children but it was so much easito enjoy the baby stage with the third and fourth because I was more chill. I didn’t worry as much and life flowed better. Thanks for putting all of this into words!
Exactly, Shannon! I also enjoy the baby stage more now than I ever have because of what you said. Plus, I also realize how fast this stage goes by, so I try to savor more moments with my babies.
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I have one child, a 6 yr old boy with ADHD. He needs a lot of attention! We’ve been trying to adopt for a few years now. Some days I wonder if it’s just wishful thinking that they will entertain each other or if it’ll just be twice as hard with two. On days when there’s no school, we spend 2-4 hrs at the park or somewhere with kids because he’s such a social butterfly (I’m an introvert, so this is extremely draining for me). If we don’t get him time with other kids, he climbs all over me and talks to me constantly. I love him like crazy, but sometimes I need to be able to make dinner without constant reminders of “it’s dangerous to cling to mommy when I’m carrying a pot of boiling water/sharp knife”. I try to give him things to do to keep him entertained, but he always has to show me everything.
Whenever I babysit, it’s so much easier. It’s like the other child babysits him for me.
Yes, I’m sure if you get another child or two in your home, that could help tremendously for your son to interact with them! I will pray for wisdom and guidance over you, Jules, in every decision involving him and just having an overabundance of patience when needed. 😉
Wow. Very encouraging thank you! I have 2 children 15 months apart (now 2.5yr old and 15 month old). Was very challenging but easier now. When God so blesses us with more we are excited. We are also stepping into foster care hopefully 🙂 They are hard sometimes but blessings.
God bless
Thanks, Renee. Wow, you have 2 that are 15 months apart. That’s closer than any of mine. Its encouraging to hear other mothers who have a heart to mother many children. Blessings to you in this mothering journey. 🙂
I am struggling with the idea of having a second child. I desire to have one but when imagine what it is taking to raise one emotionally and physically, fear creeps in. This post is so encouraging. Thanks for sharing.
I encourage you to have more, Sussy! Nothing on this earth can we take into heaven with us but our children.
I can’t even tell you how encouraging this was to me! Especially as I prepare (mentally as much as any other way!) for the arrival of our second child. I very much want to have several children, but I often fear that I won’t be able to handle multiple kids. When I lose my patience with my son or just yearn for some personal time I think, “How are you going to be able to do this with several if you struggle with one??” Your list encouraged me so, so much. I especially liked #2 – gaining confidence. I had VERY little baby experience when I had our first, so everything felt completely overwhelming. The second time around, at least I’ll have some experience under my belt! Although I’m sure he/she will have his/her own curveballs to throw at me. 🙂 Thanks for sharing this post!
When I had 1 and then 2 children, each time I also wondered how in the world I was going to do this mothering thing! But each time I got pregnant, those thoughts & feelings got smaller and smaller, and then were replaced with more confidence and love! I’m not sure how far apart your two will be. But I do have to say, for me, it was a little rough during the first year & a half when my second was born. They were only 18 months apart, so I had 2 very dependent children with no older ones to help out. However, from my experience so far, it does get easier and more enjoyable the older they get! Glad this post was an encouragement to you. 🙂
All great points. I have 5 children, the first 4 biological, the last one through the miracle of adoption. I am far from a supermom, but I am so blessed to have my children. They grow self esteem by helping each other. They build each other up and learn from each other’s mistakes.
They do shine a spot light on your weaknesses and make you strive to be better. It is not all roses, but I am thankful for every painful moment because it made me stronger.
That’s all so true! I agree that so much character and self esteem is built within them because they have each other. Thanks for sharing your input!
Delightful read! I only had two daughters, but every year there was a new classroom full of tiny humans to teach! Christine Maxwell Hand to Heart
Thanks, Christine!